Friday

So every month my staff gets together on the first Friday of the month, well, for First Friday. We've done this as long as I've been at my school, so for seven years I've been part of this. We get together at someone's house, more often than not at Spencer and Rhonda's, for food and beverages, and sometimes a movie or fire on the patio.
It hit me tonight, that this was my last first Friday. I won't be part of the staff next year, nor will I be part of any staff. I'm not sure what to feel right now. I think I need more time to process this one. I know I need to, but can't seem to force myself to go there. When someone asks if I'm excited about what's coming, my gut reaction isn't alway, yea! It's more of, I think so, but look at all I'm leaving. That's more of where I am right now. The fact that I am leaving a group of people that are so amazing, wonderful, all of those things, and going to a staff of 1, is kind of hard to imagine. When I listen to my prinicpal talk about teachers he is considering for a position, and I realize how high his standards are, how high his expectations are, I can't help but wonder why in the world I'm leaving. I am one who met those standards and expectations, one who earned his respect. And I'm choosing to leave this? Am I crazy? Do I realize how many people would love to be in that position? I guess I didn't really get it until tonight. I've caught glimpses of it in the past, but it really hit home tonight.